There's a scene in Back to the Future where Marty McFly, in his puffer vest, transports back to the fifties and walks into Mel's Diner. "Hey kid, What did you do, jump ship?" asks Mel. "Well, what's with the life preserver?" These comical, institutionally shapeless blobs of nylon looked silly in the 80s, they looked silly before their time, and they continue to look silly now that their time is long past. Someone please tell Elie Tahari (shown) and everyone else who's been trying to push them on us for fall 2009.