Every once in a while, someone like The New York Times produces an article declaring that preppy style has returned as an honest-to-God fashion trend to the U.S. from whichever distant culture was sporting it ironically as a sort of sartorial Jerry Lewis. And at those times it reminds us that there's a new generation that needs to be warned of the dangers of taking this seriously. So just to be clear, for all you kids out there: Gregg Marmalard, the impotent president of Omega House in Animal House, was SUPPOSED to be a douchebag. They dressed him to look like a douchebag, and everyone who wants to emulate him is a douchebag too. Now put down the J. Press catalogue and find a hobby that will be less damaging to your future, like experimenting with drugs or unprotected sex.